In temporal diplomacy news, the Future issued a formal apology for sending time travelers to the present without even leaving a note. “We’re really sorry about not calling while we were in the century, but it will be a zoo around … Continue reading
I live in the Research Triangle Park area of North Carolina. For those of you who are not here, it’s basically a small Silicon Valley with no valley, less traffic, cheaper homes, and more tobacco than marijuana. Because it is a relatively high-tech area, the population is divided into engineers and people who have to put up with engineers. This fact is the only reason I could get away with this.
I was at Wal-Mart earlier today to pick up some things I needed: an umbrella, a new coffee maker, and some grapes. (Disclaimer: I didn’t really need grapes. I just like them.) When I got to the checkout line with my items, the checker said hi and asked me, “Did you find everything?”
I get asked this a lot, along with “How was everything?” in restaurants. Apparently I give off a vibe that says, “Ask me about everything!”. I have a hard enough time keeping track of what day it is. So normally I will respond apologetically, “I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking for everything.”
Today was different. In a flash of what I call “brilliance” (like a seizure, but less painful), I smiled and cheerfully responded, “Yep! Now I can finish my time machine!” I didn’t get a laugh, but I also didn’t get detained by security, which I probably would have in a less tech-savvy part of the country.
Disclaimer: You do not need grapes to build a time machine. I got the grapes as a snack, in case all the food in the future is in pill form. Actual produce from the 21st Century might be worth a fortune in steak pellets or dilithium 500 years from now.
I am a sucker for time travel stories. I love the whole idea of alternate possibilities, and I’ve never been able to figure out why they confuse so many people. I still remember movie reviews complaining that “Back to the Future 2” was hard to follow. But I suppose this speaks to the kind of people who review movies for a living.
On the other hand, even I am confused by the timeline of the Eagles’ “Already Gone”. See if you can figure out what’s going on here. Continue reading
Reposted from Facebook:
As an aside, according to my friend Sara, other people walk around the mall thinking about clothes and shopping and where they parked and stuff. Bunch of weirdos…